Out of Body Experience

On Tuesday, February 4th, I began experiencing what I later realized were actual contractions. I didn't think too much of it because they only lasted during the early morning hours and subsided later that day. It was a different story when Wednesday, February 5th rolled around. The contractions began at midnight and stayed.

I didn't know I was experiencing legitimate contractions. I just thought they were the pre-labor contractions I read about. I figured, my next appointment with my doctor was on the morning of the 5th, so I would ride it out. But the pain was so intense. For eight hours, I had 1 minute contractions in 5 minute intervals. Then later in the morning, they became a little less consistent, but still intense when they came.  I didn't know that my doctor would have me admitted to the hospital, but it looked like baby girl was ready. My doctor told me I was already halfway there, dilated at a 5.

It becomes kind of blurry after I was admitted into the hospital. It was early afternoon by the time I finished packing my hospital bag and checked in. I had to wait until I got completely through an IV before I could have the epidural administered. So several hours of contractions kept me on the edge. Once I got the epidural, my water broke 30 minutes later.

Let me tell you two things that distinctly remain in my mind. One: the epidural. Don't think that when being given an epidural that you will feel absolutely nothing. That is a total myth. They explained to me that I still have to feel the contractions in order to know when to push. And two: Experiencing your water break is the craziest feeling ever. It's not just a small thing. This is an event! It feels like an ocean tide just exited your body. The sensation is just unreal! I didn't know what it would be like but I certainly knew what had happened when it did.

Eight hours to get dilated to ten.

The pain of contractions.

Inhale. Exhale.

The push.

The counting to ten.

Repeat two more times.

Wait for the next contraction.

At some point I felt like it was an out of body experience. As I write this now, I don't even remember the pain.

I still look at her in awe. I still can't believe I had her in me. I tell her, "So you're the one that has been kicking me!"

I love her forever.

Happy Birthday, Lara! 2.5.20









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